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Saturday Unisex Haircut

OCTOBER 21, 2006
Mr.John Hair Stylist
The strangest dream:

    Bob is the barber. Edel is in the chair next to me reading a newspaper upside down. Leo is riding by outside with playing cards in the spokes. Waxman is walking his Chihuahuas. Zina is saying something but I can't hear her because Flaherty is playing the bongos and has a hep cat goatee. Hitz, McCauley, Mayforth, you were all there... and J.D. was throwing cake at everyone shouting " Birdie Num Nums, Birdie Num Nums ". Fisher and Sloan were tickling my toes with an Ostrich feather while Bakal and was combing Nancy's hair. Zimm and Dunlavey were dressed like uncle Joe from Petticoat Junction, and playing checkers on a pickle barrel. There were photos on the wall of Barmundo and Gothard in fake military uniforms or marching band uniforms, it's hard to remember. Obrian, Moran, and Kilpatrick were carrying on about bangers and mashed, and Linzie looked like she was about to pour the jar of combs in blue liquid over Murawski's head. This part gets fuzzy- Elwood comes in dressed in a zoot suit with Laura and Pelavin who are Pez dispensers. Matcho and Reese play Ping Pong without a ball. RAG found a door in the floor that led to a secret room. Burckhardt and Cusack were in a giant cauldron that was filled with broth and rhubarb. Moores was in a devil costume dancing with his trident. The lights were flashing like a strobe light, and I saw Saunders playing with the light switch. Wiggins on his trapeze was doing the grand finale, and Steinberg threw soggy marshmellows at him. They would stick to him and after a few minutes he looked like a bumpy snowman. That's when I started to wake up. The rest of you were there but it's hard to remember. As hard as I tried...it faded away.

I gotta stop eating that Rarebit before I go to bed.
© 2024 David Goldin